看守兵器的，和上陣的一樣得賞

我想先說我自己。Let me start with myself.

我在前線的這些年，常常被人看見。可是真正撐住我的，是一些幾乎沒有人看見的手。In my years at the front, I am often the one people see. But the ones who truly hold me up are a few pairs of hands almost no one sees.

這支影片，是 Joanna Chen——和她先生 Michael 一起，從第一天起就接待我、差派我的同伴——被問到她在大使命裡的位置。This video is Joanna Chen—who, together with her husband Michael, has welcomed and sent me since day one—being asked about her place in the Great Commission.

她說，因為個性的緣故，她比較適合做接待的人、差派的人。She says that because of her temperament, she is more suited to be the one who welcomes, the one who sends.

她很誠實地說，信了主以後，生活的圈子反而越來越小，身邊還不認識主的朋友沒剩幾個。She says, very honestly, that after becoming a believer her circle of life grew smaller, and few of those around her still did not know the Lord.

所以她想：如果我能做一點什麼，那就做一個接待神的使者的人，在前線的人打仗的時候，我在後面把該守的守住。So she thought: if I can do a little something, let me be the one who hosts God's messengers—while those at the front are in the fight, I hold the line behind them.

她引了一句聖經，是我每次想到都會安靜下來的。她說，看守兵器的，和在前面打仗的，得的是一樣的賞賜。She quoted a line of Scripture that quiets me every time. She says the one who guards the supplies and the one who fights at the front receive the same reward.

她說：「看守兵器的，跟在前面打仗的，是有一樣的賞賜。」In her own words: "The one who keeps the supplies and the one who fights at the front—they receive the same reward."

然後她講了她怎麼看自己。她說，她做的是微微小小的一份工，在神的家裡，像一顆小小的螺絲。Then she said how she sees herself. She says what she does is a tiny, small piece of work—in God's household, like one little screw.

我當下就回了她一句：你不小啊。沒有你們，我沒有辦法安心在外面做這麼多年的工。Right then I answered her: you are not small. Without the two of you, I could not have done these many years of work out there with a settled heart.

訪談裡有一段，我聽了心裡特別暖。她說，這些年她也灰心過，也害怕過。There was a part of the interview that touched me deeply. She says that across these years she has had her discouragement, and her fear.

她說，當基督徒久了，看著身邊的事、身邊的人，看著我們現在所在的地方，有時候心裡會想：我們還能撐多久呢？She says that after walking with the Lord a long time, watching the things and people around her, watching the place we are now in, sometimes her heart wonders: how much longer can we hold on?

她沒有把這份軟弱藏起來。她說，正因為知道靠自己什麼都做不了，她才常常回到主的面前。She did not hide that weakness away. She says it is precisely because she feels she can do nothing on her own that she keeps returning to the Lord's face.

她說：「我常常會要回到主的面前，因為我覺得靠著我們，我們真的啥都不能做。」In her own words: "I often have to return to the Lord's presence, because I feel that on our own, we really can do nothing."

我聽見的，是一道門。她在軟弱裡覺得靠自己什麼都不能，這份軟弱反倒成了她一次又一次回到主面前的入口。What I heard was a door. In her weakness she feels she can do nothing on her own—and that very weakness became her entryway back to the Lord, again and again.

她最後說的那句，很平實，卻很有力量。她說，差派的時候到了沒有，我們不知道，所以還是就去做我們該做的。What she ended on was plain, and strong. She says we do not know the timing of the sending, so we simply keep doing what we are meant to do.

她說：「我們就還是去做我們該做的事。」In her own words: "We just keep doing the work we are meant to do."

這就是 me 到 us 到 WE：在前面被看見的我，和在後面守著兵器的她，本來就是領一樣賞賜的同一隊人。This is me to us to WE: the me who is seen at the front and the her who guards the supplies behind were always one team, receiving one same reward.

那顆她說「小小的螺絲」，撐住的是我整個工場。The "little screw" she spoke of held up my whole field.